Three Ways to Overcome Mental Hurdles to Making Real Dietary Change
Oct 17, 2012, Updated Nov 07, 2015
My job is awesome: to help people improve their diets and their lives โ and not just in October. People resist dietary changes (whether unprocessed, healthier, vegetarian, gluten-free, etc.) for many reasons, so I wanted to bring up common ones I see in my work. You also get action steps to move past these roadblocks and stay on your path to health and happiness.
These may not apply to you, but even so, they may help you understand where someone else is coming from. You have to start from where you are, not where you want to be.
Hurdle #1: Deprivation
Food isnโt just fuel for our bodies – itโs our culture, tradition, and reward structure.
Thoughts that keep you stuck: Many people approach dietary changes thinking: โI canโt.โ Whether itโs holiday food, happy hour with friends, or dessert, when faced with that prospect, itโs no wonder so many people say theyโll start tomorrow.
A diet is simply the way you eat. When you think of it as a temporary way of eating to lose weight you set up restrictive limits that make eating a battle of willpower versus taste.
Re-frame: You CAN eat anything you want, but you CHOOSE not to eat things that donโt make you feel good.
Instead try โcrowding outโ by adding in more nutrient-dense foods. Set goals like eating fresh fruit every day, having a salad with lunch, or adding one more vegetable to dinner each night. By filling up on healthful options, youโll have less room for non-nutritious choices.
Whatโs the very first step you can take to add healthier food to your diet?
Hurdle #2: Time Management
Thoughts that keep you stuck: โCooking takes too much time.โ Weโre so conditioned (and told by advertisements) that spending more than 20 minutes in the kitchen is a waste, so people happily toss a salt-bomb in the microwave and are proud for saving time.
Re-frame: View time spent preparing healthful food as an investment in your health and happiness.
Think of ways to prep elements ahead of time. When I make breakfast I often throw a big pot of grains or beans on the stove to simmer away while I eat and shower. They cool as I get ready, and are ready to reheat for lunch or dinner. The rest are split between fridge and freezer to use later.
Menu-planning can also be really helpful. Set aside 20-30 minutes in your calendar (โIf itโs not scheduled, itโs not real.โ โ Marie Forleo) once a week to save you time and decision-making energy each day.
What is your biggest struggle with food and time management? In a perfect world, how would your meal planning look?
Hurdle #3: Fear of Failure
This is the most common fear I see, and itโs the most complex.
If you never start, you canโt fail! Itโs safer and more comfortable to sit on the couch and eat bonbons than to try something and risk failure. It sounds melodramatic and silly, but itโs often true.
Thoughts that keep you stuck: What if I donโt lose weight? What if Iโm hungry? What if itโs too hard? What if my friends make fun of me? What if people find out I donโt actually have it all together? (Where my perfectionists at? Holla!)
What to do instead: Approach a lifestyle change with curiosity, not judgment. Like Thomas Edison said, โI have not failed, I have merely found 10,000 ways that donโt work.โ
Answer these three questions:
- Why do you want to make a change?
- Whatโs keeping you from doing it?
- How is it serving you to stay where you are?
For #3, I often hear, โIt isnโt.โ Thatโs not true, however. Not changing is also a choice. Eating the same way, even if it makes you feel unwell, is comfortable and familiar. Perhaps it allows you to avoid an imagined confrontation with your partner or kids about making dietary changes. Or maybe it lets you eat bonbons instead of facing the fact that youโre not dealing with your stress level or emotions very well right now.
Again, approach this exercise with curiosity, not judgment. You canโt make a change if you donโt know where youโre starting from.
Have you confronted any of these roadblocks yourself? Have you overcome them? What is your biggest obstacle to making healthy changes, whether going unprocessed or otherwise?
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“Switzerland/Extreme Bungee Jump” ยฉ 2007 Carla MacNeil, used under creative commons license.
One of the most helpful things I’ve ever done has been to be very goal oriented. My goal is to get really strong and I want to achieve that goal so bad! So whenever it’s time to eat I ask myself if this food is gonna help me get to that goal.
I also like what you had to say about adding things in.
Wonderful point, Kyra. I would add that they should be achievable goals! For example, if you want to start running from nothing, your first goal isn’t “run a marathon” (even if you do eventually), your first goal might be “run 1 mile without stopping.”
Thank you for adding to the conversation!
These are great tips, Stacey! For me, I always failed as soon as I saw a little bit of success. It was as though I was afraid of succeeding. It was a psychological hurdle I had to overcome before being able to move on and make significant changes.
Thanks, Dara, and congratulations on your own health transformation!
Great point, self-sabotage is a HUGE hurdle for many people. Fear of success is up there with fear of failure, really. We like staying “safe” since change means unknown outcome, which is scary! That’s definitely another important area I focus on with clients.
My re-frame for myself when I chose to ditch a lot of the unhealthy foods (refined and processed) was I am making a change for health. If I told myself I was going on a diet to lose weight, I knew it wouldn’t work. “Diet” has such a negative connotation in our society because we associate it with deprivation when really a diet is just what we eat. Once I got this in my head, making good choices followed in line. Losing a few pounds in the process was just a bonus. ๐
Beautiful, Debi. I can’t add anything to that, so thank you for sharing!
Stacy, over the years we have given up (or made concience decisions to retain) certain foods that do not pass the kitchen test. We are pretty torn on a particular chocolate hazelnut spread. A while ago we noticed that the 2nd ingredient was palm oil and declared it a non food and luckly found a good substitute at Trader joes. They have since discontinued that product and “N” has made its way back into our cupboard. I hate that we love it so much that we disreguard our standards for its velvety chocolate spreadability yummness. Help my family by suggesting a replacement or recipe for a simular condiment.
Sunny, I found several homemade versions of gianduja (the generic name for chocolate hazelnut spread) and a lot of them used powdered sugar and canola oil. I’d say honey or a less-refined sugar of your choice run through the food processor to make it superfine would work, and I’d just use coconut or other nut oil (almond, hazelnut, walnut, etc.).
A few variations I found:
http://www.latimes.com/features/la-fo-nutellarec11a-2009feb11,0,1158986.story
http://familystylefood.com/2010/06/homemade-nutella/
http://ohsheglows.com/2011/01/12/4-ingredient-dark-chocolate-almond-butter/
http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2010/12/heavenly-chocolate-hazelnut-almond-spread-recipe.html
This might take some additional research on my part since you’ve twisted my arm. ๐
Biggest time challenge: putting something in the “food bank” as it were for when *I’m* out of commission. What do you do when all you can make (and not very well at that) is green jello?
Brighid, to clarify, because you don’t know HOW to cook, or you don’t have the energy to cook? I want to make sure I answer what you’re actually asking. =)
Too sick! And unfortunately, there’s too much that I *have* to do right now. At least today, it was different highly-processed to get through the day. ๐
This won’t work now, but in the future, it could work to stock your own unprocessed frozen dinners – soup is a perfect example.
You can also buy prepped food that isn’t processed. Better grocery store delis, pre-cut fruit, the grab-n-go case… Or if all you can do is eat cereal, at least make sure it’s unprocessed cereal.